Retsgip’s Anime Blog

Darkshaunz inserts 3 more coins.

Score: 8.7/10

This episode gave off a really big “Game Over” vibe. I thoroughly enjoyed it, mainly for reasons like the fact that this arc is seeing it’s more serious reality for the characters. Before, everything seemed a bit too shounen-conventional with the fights (see: easymode). It looked like they may have had some difficulty engaging the mascara-laden clowns which infested the area, but always came up on top. Now the difficulty’s been ramped up to Super Ninja Gaiden mode, and I think the gang’s feeling the sharp end of stick this time. Problem is, they only have 1 continue each.

Ichigo hates having to cart women like that all the time.

Quattro Espada sounds like a new Toyota hatchback

Ulquiorra sure knows how to make friends, when I first looked at him, I just knew that this guy would be the social animal of Las Nachos. It’s bad enough that he looks like a clown having an identity crisis, that he is slowly trying to be as Goth as he possibly could. My theory is that he is a pissed off dead viking who never quite made it to Valhalla, it’s safe to assume that he is also pissed because half his viking horn helmet is lost somewhere. So he decides to make friends the Viking Clown way and tell Ichigo the equivalent of, “Hey man, so I heard Rukia totally fought to her death. What I am trying to say is, she’s reached her expiry date roflmao XD. Shit was so tight!”. Now, if you were Ichigo and you oh I don’t know happened to go through hell (er, heaven) and back to rescue your woman and you just realized you are going to have to do that shit All over again, I’d be feeling slightly irked (more like amazingly furious). Ichigo tries to evade a fight so he can play the magical calvary to swoop Rukia from her lack of anime airtime.

In case you couldn’t tell - Ichigo’s kind of angry.

Ulquiorra wouldn’t have that of course, he then tells Ichigo that he was the one responsible for luring Orihime here and essentially forcing the girl to see her friends go down like flies as each day passes. Ichigo now resembled that slightly crazy employee in wal-mart as the supervisor tells him, “Hey Jim, I’m going to have to let you go man…sorry”. You can just see Jim (Ichigo) going, “W-what do you mean let go? I’ve been here for like 7 years”. His eye is kind of twiching, his fists are rock hard and his mind is in the absolute fritz. That’s the kind of look Ichigo had by that point. Obviously Ichigo’s strategy is quite simple when dealing with a far superior enemy: Using no strategy whatsoever. He is however, full of brilliant ideas. Brilliant by the standards of an inanimate pencil sharpener. Ichigo decides that putting everything into one hit was the best thing since the wheel and powdered milk. Not even Goku was that stupid, and we know how stupid Goku is (King Kai bless his soul).

This attack was very strong, yet looked like a squishy. Only Bleach could ever do that.

The sense of scale

What I was impressed with however, ladies and gentlemen, was the sheer volume of power he put into those two attacks. The first one is your typical Vaizard Bankai Getsuga wave, which ultiamtely results in a wall of black energy so large that even Ulquiorra’s arrogant one-handed shielding has him sweating bullets. A few seconds into the attack and Ulquiorra realizes that he is knee-deep in a shitstorm of reiatsu. So he does what is meant to be “awe-inspiring”, when he takes out his other hand from his pocket (Holy shit!!11one!!!). Wow, amazing, Jeez. I take my hands out from my pockets all the time (it’s a latent skill of mine), but then again, I don’t make a big deal about it. Then again, I don’t exactly look like Viking Goth Clown either. Ichigo, who sees this as a sign of weakness, decides Not to do what every sane outclassed fighter would do: Use this opportunity to get the hell out of there. No, he decides to hang around and actually allow Ulquiorra to recover just so he can try to finish of Ulquiorra with his Jelly-blob mess of an attack. I seriously imagined him making a Getsuga Tenshou equivalent of Cotton candy.

Hey, now would be a good time for you to stop scratching yourself.

XXXtreme Knitting!!!

One thing good about Ichigo is the “All in a day’s work” look he puts out after a big attack. He very stoicly assumes that one super mega hit is going to take out a pissed off viking espada who missed the train to eternal merriment. He was about to pick up his Nell doll and scoot off to rescue hot bitches, when suddenly, guess who isn’t even bleeding? Ulquiorra’s clothes sure took a lot of damage though, something I am sure make-up isn’t going to be terribly pleased with. Ulquiorra then fires off a cero beam from his index finger, telling the viewers that his power level is so high, he doesn’t even need to try (and telling us that this arc is going to continue for a looong time). The next to happen is the killing off of the main hero. Basically, and I’m not shitting you here, Ulquiorra shoves his hand into Ichigo and kills him. Ichigo is now probably chatting with Rukia and Chad in the after-after-world. I am not sure where dead people go when they die, but I’m guessing it’s a pretty kickin’ place with monocles and crumpets.

“….dude, this was a Esprit import from France, now you’ve wrecked it”

“Welcome to Dead Heroes Land, population: You”

It’s not nice to pick on someone…

…Especially when their boobs outclass yours by at least 3 alphabets. I guess the two Whore-rancars, or “Whorrancars” for short just couldn’t stand it anymore. If there’s something Orihime can do without saying or batting an eye, is knock you out with those two bazookas. As far as I am concerned, Orihime’s been behaving herself as a prisoner in the Citadel of Boredom. She’s acted like a prisoner should, submissive, bored to tears, agonizing over her dead friends and also generally sulking around and making viewers feel like shit as we watch youtube videos and munch on twinkies. She’s been a good girl, but whorrancars don’t like it when girls look infinitely better and behave properly, so they have to go in and be the typical “wo-MAN” stereotype. The black haired one is probably looser than the rubber ring around my Paintball gun and the yellow haired one seems to have lost herself on the way to a fucking lesbian bar.

How about, let’s play go fuck yourselves.

Pretty sure Ori-princess-chan doesn’t want to play your AIDS-infested game.

Go fuck yourselves bitches.

I mean that literally too (Bring Lilinette back!), you have one of them which looks like a second without sexual penetration is going to drive her into humping the couch, and the other one has that manly aura which is probably seeking some kind of sexual relief so her pretty little face isn’t so far shoved up her own arse. Now, of course Orihime plays victim here, but she’s also stupid and responsible for that shit. I know Orihime has an excellent slapping hand and she should be able to use her shield powers. What she should have done was, shield herself, then slap the two whores back to the brothel from which they were spawned from. Maybe she’s too depressed or drained from watching her love interest die, I know that can put a person down at times (or all the time). With that said, the Black haired whorrancar proceeds to step on Orihime’s head. But the good news is, Bleach never allows such anger-generating moments to go on for long, these girls are probably going to get impaled somehow. And not in a pleasant way.

Its easy to have a nice room, just don’t fornicate on every single corner of yours. Whore.

I miss Lilinette already, she was hot and lovable. Bring her back, Haruhi, please.

Young man! I said young man!

It’s fun to stay in the Superfag Espada’s place, they have everything, for a screwed shinigami to enjoy, you can get yourself mopped by Fraccion and hang out with the Espada boys (I apologize for that). Renji’s putting up a good fight I’d say, people have often said that Renji was the next to get whacked and the entire team has to load from the last saved checkpoint. The thing I admire most about Renji is that whilst he has the capacity to get emotional, he is just pure blood and guts. He has a lot of gall and is like a stubborn stain for the enemy, no matter how hard you scrub or pour bleach all over, it just won’t let off. He’ll find some new way to piss you off and throw you out from your high horse. Which is exactly what he’s done with Pinkspada here. This guy seems to highlight any miniscule victory he achieves, such as making the Ottavan Espada move, he enjoys this victory thoroughly. Only to get his face crushed by Pinkspada’s army of hollow slaves.

Pinkspada realizes pink wigs have just gone out of fashion.

The monsters from Sesame street are more terrifying than these.

The Quincy Supremacy

Oh I know what you are thinking, isn’t it too convenient that as Renji’s about to get crushed by a giant hand, that he somehow gets his sword out in 0.251 seconds in order to cut and wound it? Well yes, it’s rather convenient. What’s even more convenient is that as the giant is wailing painfully, it gets shot in the hip by Ishida. Renji, who seems rather shocked that his spot of luck just grew to a deep puddle, is stunned, yet somehow relieved that reinforcements have arrived. I also enjoyed Ishida’s smug grin as he teases Renji on how much he failed to do any damage to anything so far. At least we’re reminded that Ishida can be a jerk at times, a really big one. Personally, I’m very much looking forward to see some Shinigami and Quincy tag-teaming, reminds me of the time Ichigo first met Ishida. There’ll be some rough and misunderstanding moments, but Ishida’s a good sport, and so is Renji. They’ll think of something, or you know, die like Ichigo, Rukia and Chad.

“Whatssa madda huh Renji? can’t handle the heat? S’ok h’omes, Ishida DA man is here. Supaflyyy!”

Cheers,

Darkshaunz

PS: Next episode prediction - Everyone Dies and Bleach ends. Thank you, come again.